It's funny, the questions I am asked lately seem to come from two polar opposite standpoints. I am asked when I am having another baby or when I am going to do another Ironman. Maybe these come from the same line of thinking though -- it's time for SOMETHING right?
I shouldn't be, but I am a little amazed every time I hear of a mom of a young toddler who is expecting again. First of all, who are these babies that let their moms have 30 seconds to themselves to even consider that there is time in the world to care for another? My little one may be shy around strangers, and he really likes to be at home lately, but he would probably be considered an "easy" baby by exactly no one. That is not a bad thing! I love how interactive he is, but it can be a little exhausting. I know this means he is learning so fast and wants me to keep him challenged all the time. But where would an infant fit in?
Secondly, Jeremy has pointed out that I am unusual in the length of time I have breastfed. It never seemed unusual to me, since my family is just the same. Recently I filled out an online survey about nursing past a year. It asked about everyone I had discussed this decision with, and how supportive they were about me breastfeeding past a year. I really hadn't considered it much until then, but I didn't give a second thought to nursing past a year. Of course I would continue, and I'm pretty sure I neither asked anyone's opinion (I knew the opinions of those who matter anyway) nor cared what others thought. I've almost gone two years now, and still there is no magic number in my head that will bring this all to a stop. It's the natural thing to do. Babies aren't meant to be spaced too closely together; moms' bodies are not ready for it, and the babies are not ready to give up the level of care they get as the youngest member of the family. So really, nobody breastfeeds past a year? I know I'm getting "old" but I can't quit something so good for my toddler for the potential sibling just yet. I definitely don't want to criticize moms who do choose to cut short their breastfeeding years. This is just something that I believe to be the right thing to do with my little one.
The next question, about when I will do another Ironman, I really don't have an answer for. My motivation to train says it is still not time for me. That's what I DID for 10 years, and I loved it. But this is a completely different season in my life, and I love it too. Ironman just doesn't fit in right now. I know my baby is almost 2, and so many moms are back out there well before first birthdays, and that's fine! It's just not for me.
I read a quote from a speedy age grouper that said something about there being no award for mom of the youngest baby at an Ironman. And that once those baby and toddler years are gone, they are gone! So true, what a wonderful time in their little lives. I don't want to miss too much, and I already miss my baby even when I'm gone for a couple of hours at a time.
But the competition to come back fast is very real in triathlon circles. It caused me a bit of stress right after my cesarean. I felt like I was lagging behind where I should have been. But really, everyone's open abdominal cavity surgery is different. Was it because I never went into labor? Maybe. Regardless, it was not a competition. Exercising as much as I did while pregnant and running until Hunter was born means I was just plain lucky. It didn't make me tougher than any other pregnant mom, or less lazy, or crazier either. Ok, maybe crazier. There is no standard number of exercise hours that will make you the fittest pregnant mama, or how many weeks you should take off after delivery, or how many months after the birth that you should be able to race or to PR. It's ok with me to not have a goal of getting in another Ironman until Hunter is in high school, if ever. I'll take my 6 or 7 hours a week of exercise and do the most I can with it for now. And hopefully I can keep Hunter's illusion of me alive. As he said, "Hunter fast, Dad slow, Mom fast." That's right baby, don't forget it!